29th August Monday Bank holiday

I had

3 meat on rice

Notable events

First of all I would like to congratulate Mona on eating her first COMPLETE MEAL (singapore fried noodles) , she even looked like she enjoyed it.



Choo continued her flirtations with the Wong keis waiters, I heard she filmed 'Raunchy Rachaels Wong Kei Wankoff ' last week which is why they were all winking at her . Perhaps that's why she had a few extra fish balls in her soup too this week.

We got some of the rudest service for a while , he couldnt even look at us when he served the food, preffering to look away while he put the plates on the table

Chet got some disgusting looking Aubergine meal which everyone tried and said was nice , but I think they were just trying to be nice to him because of the vegetarian in wong keis thing. you've gotta feel sorry for those guys. if i couldnt consume animal fat i dont know what id do

Friday 26th August

Attendees

Chet
Kaz

I had

3 meat rice. I felt brave enough to order. It was of course amazing. Chet had deep fried bean curd and rice (he was tempted by the aubergine but of course change is rubbish).

Notable events

Myself and Chet were in a pub/bar, the place had many pretty ladies, the drinks were flowing, the cool Friday people were out. However, this did not satisfy our bellies, so we made the choice to go to Wong Kei... we were not wrong to do so.

Number of Visits since 20 May (3 months ish)

This doesn't include many wong keis without me, of which Kaz and Rob do on their own sometimes in the week, all of my vists are on there though probably putting Kaz in the lead

Choo obviously the best performing female on there , Chet the best and only Vegetarian

Kaz also get's the prize for most consistent, only missing no more than 1 visit when others have gone . See the figure below

Sunday 21st August

attendees

Poom
Rob
Kaz
Choo
Mona
Chet
Kaif

I had

3 meat on rice - an excellent portion. I noticed that there were bits of BBQ pork attached to my belly pork, I put my hand on my chin and pondered : could it be that BBQ pork is just the other bit of meat on a belly pork joint?
Tsing Tao beer
Hot and sour soup

Events and observations



'Beef and tomato on rice'

What kind of spastic would order this you ask? Rob of course

Beef and Tomato on rice i repeat again
Does that sound like appealing chinese food?
Do you think your in a pizza shop ?
Does your waiter look like a man named Luigi?

Kaif quote which he should keep in mind next time :

"The idea of a menu is to give you an idea of what the dish is like and what is contains'

I say this because when the dish arrived Rob was of course surprised with what was infront of him. his horrible screwed up face had an expression when he saw it as if to ask : why is there Tomatoes and beef in it? why does it look disgusting?.... Why do you think dickhead? Can you even imagine a configuration that beef , tomatoes and rice can be cooked in that would ever be nice in a Chinese restaurant? I've never even seen a tomato in Chinese food, they probably had to import it form the Italian restaurant next door especially to make this disgusting thing. It also had some horrible looking sauce which I am pretty sure came out of a baked bean can.

Kaz ordering Pork Chop and Rice


It is funny that because of the events of the previous visit Kaz can't have 3 meat on rice anymore out of the fear of getting 3 separate meat dishes. What is not funny is that he has broken my ordering confidence of the same thing. Yesterday I was left stuttering like a loser telling the waiter 'J...J...Just a single dish yeah? Ju...just one 3 meat on rice' not only do I anger the waiter acting like this, I might be confusing him also.

I've been thinking about the best way to order this dish and I think the correct line to use is
'Hello Sir , please could I order 3 Mixed meats on rice please ' , No hand signals , no ' 3 BBQ please ' , just read out what is on the menu and everything will be ok

Choos new hair style


We had to wait for a table because Choo wouldnt put her hair the way the wong kei waiters like it. Nice one. now put it back how it was , and how about some eye make up to make those eyes less round please. A gentleman gets accustomed to certain things, like only being abused by waiters a little bit, and not having to sit in the basement, so please fix these small things so i don't have to go back there.

Sunday 7th August

Attendees

Poom
Rob
kaz
kaif
choo

I had :

3 meat on rice
Fried chicken starter

Notable events :

I arrived to the White Horse feeling very hungry for some chilli sauce and meat, but as I reached into my pockets for my bike key a most terrible feeling hit me.

I left my Bike lock key at home

What was I to do ? The feeling was at first acceptance
ok I'm just going to have to go home , I cant cycle back an hour just to get my key

Then desperation
Maybe I could make it in 40 minutes there and back ! I can still go , all is not lost !

Then depression
I may aswell just get a pint then and just go home, my weekend is ruined, my week is ruined, my LIFE is ruined
I could picture my friends in the restaurant, laughing, literally chewing the duck fat without me, maybe I could get a take away and eat it in the park? ... No id have no chilli sauce , or not enough anyway.

So eventually after a meeting with my wong kei crew I decided to take off the wheels and try and bring it into the restaurant, I felt sad. I almost knew i wouldnt make it, but anything for the 3 meats !

I approached the restaurant, Rob with one wheel kaz with the other, single file like some kind of death March, I knew i was going to almost certain humiliation and failure. I approached the waiter bike in hand, like it was normal to carry a bike frame around, The waiter with the cold eyes immediately told me

Cant bring bike in here

I begged , on the verge of tears , I was very hungover and feeling emotional

Please, I go downstair !

The waiter looked at me, he saw the desperation in my eye, & that stony heart for one second softened and he said some magic words to me

'go in back'

I'll quote Patrick Bateman from American Psycho here

"I'm on the verge of tears by the time we arrive at Espace, since I'm positive we won't have a decent table. But we do, and relief washes over me in an awesome wave"

Sunday 14th August

Points for dedication

Whilst clearly being dedicated to Wong Kei, we have yet to rename ourselves in its favour.

http://wongkeiming.blogspot.com/

Mr Kei. We salute you!

Friday 29th july

Attendees
Poom
Rob shitwith
Robs phone

I had 2 meat rice. Duck and bbq pork

Notable events
Rob had some disgusting looking mince meat rice dish
Robs phone didn't eat but was very talkative , it didn't talk to me much but they had a great conversation throughout the meal .